


Whatever Doesn’t Kill You Won’t Miss The Second Time Around

by skyswalker



Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: (also Darkness is supposed to be Frank), F/M, a comparative introspective piece on how and why these two are so similar, angst w/ a happy ending, because honestly they are, they've both been through loss and walked through hell but still believe in and try to do good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 03:14:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13137909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyswalker/pseuds/skyswalker
Summary: "But most importantly, you’ve both been friends with Darkness; have met him, shaken his cold hands, and stared into his dead eyes as he told you the world doesn’t work the way it should. Maybe you can fix that, maybe you can’t, and maybe it doesn’t really matter."





	Whatever Doesn’t Kill You Won’t Miss The Second Time Around

**Author's Note:**

> I was writing a Kastle drabble and stumbled upon the possibility of Dinah and Curtis. I couldn't resist writing a drabble solely for them!

It doesn’t matter how you die.

 

That’s what you both believe. You’ve been through hell, seen the flames lick your skin and leave their mark on you. The burns don’t fade, and with time, you don’t want them to. You don’t want to forget how you got them, what you’ve done to be the person you’ve become. You take pride in who you are.

 

But when they bury you, it won’t matter if it was a stray bullet or unexpected heart attack that puts you down. You’ll be dead. It won’t matter.

 

What matters is what you survive.

 

He has been through war. The blood, guts, and grime that can destroy or make a man. Some thrive off of it, can’t live without a fight to fight. But that’s not you anymore, maybe it never was.

 

What you have now is a hole. It’s deep and dark, and you think the more you try and talk about it, the less scary it will become. But that doesn’t work. The nightmares stay the same, the ache where your leg used to be doesn’t go away. So maybe ignoring it will work. A blind man wouldn’t know he’s in a hole after all?

 

But there are lies we tell ourselves and believe because we have to, and there are lies we tell ourselves and only serve to injure us further. This is an example of the latter.

 

She’s been through a different kind of war. A war fought with words, with uncovered truths, and loss that has crippled her. She never crossed enemy lines overseas in the name of her country, but she throws herself into the firefight for the same reason on home soil.

 

But most importantly, you’ve both been friends with Darkness; have met him, shaken his cold hands, and stared into his dead eyes as he told you the world doesn’t work the way it should. Maybe you can fix that, maybe you can’t, and maybe it doesn’t really matter.

 

Nonetheless, Darkness offered you a place beside him, and you rejected it. And he comes back to haunt you both from time to time, as reminder of what you didn’t become. Or maybe what you _could_.

 

Because there’s three different kinds of loss: body, mind, and soul. Both of you are working your way to satisfying three out of the three kinds.

 

So it doesn’t matter how you die. You’ve both come so close to it, tasted a touch of the infinite abyss and relished its temporary peace. Later, you both convinced ourselves it wasn’t true. But that would be another example of the lie.

 

So this is where you start, and maybe where you’ll end.

 

You meet on a Tuesday and the city is colder than it’s ever been.

 

She wears a scarf to work, a beanie too. The red around her nose and ears caused by the bitter cold reminds her that she can feel, even if she doesn’t want to. Three men in her life have left her reeling for different reasons. Two partners dead and a former flame responsible in varying ways for their deaths.

 

Enough to make a woman reconsider Darkness’ offer.

 

She won’t though. She has felt the flames, walked through them time and time again, and she would gladly burn than ever leave her chosen path.

 

He wears an overcoat. It’s black, sturdy, and conceals enough heat to make him forget about the winter chill. Never fully, though. There are some things you never can forget. That’s a truth he can trust.

 

But the universe is chaos. You both know that to be true. However, chaos sometimes works in your favor, as you both accidentally collide on the sidewalk, hot coffee spilling between his hands. He doesn’t feel it through his leather gloves, for that she is thankful.

 

Apologies and pleasantries are exchanged, this is who you both are. And when she looks up to see his face, there is a mutual recognition.

 

 _I know you_.

 

Darkness has many friends, many more than you both realize.

 

“Curtis Hoyle,” he introduces himself to her.

 

“Dinah Madani,” she replies.

 

What has always mattered most is what you survive. Death will come for all, you won’t waste time dwelling on it.

 

However, neither of you have considered how you will live. What you will do with the time promised between birth and death.

 

After he asks you if you’d like to get a cup of coffee, and you agree, both of you for the first time in forever will consider what that means.


End file.
